Change

"Change is the only thing that is permanent", I have heard this phrase innumerable times now. But every time I hear it, the meaning is different.

The perennial process of change is essential for our existence. We live life as a series of changes. At any point in time, we wait for the next change. As a child, the wait is to go to school, as an adolescent one wants to hang out with friends, as an adult you wanna party and go to college, then work, then wait for first salary, then promotion, then marriage, then kids............its endless!

Wait is not what makes this life worthwhile; changes do. Achieving a change is not easy. First thing is to identify the point in life when there is nothing you look forward to. You need a dose of change then! Dig deeper, explore and work towards a change, personal or professional. The more changes you make to your life, more exciting and memorable your life is. The effort put in enabling that change adds to the treasure of memories and inspiration.

So what are you going to change next?

"Good to Great"

Its a book written by the famed author Jim Collins who had also authored "Built to Last". I have not read that one though. Its an amazing book providing concrete analysis of great companies and trying to find a pattern in their success.
Some findings go against the conventional wisdom and that is what makes it different. Its an eye-opener, sort of enlightening. I have started looking for those signs in my current organization to see if it will ever become great. Long way to go .... but we will reach there someday :).
Plus you can apply some concepts to yourself and figure out what does it take to be great :).

Happy reading!!

The False Marathon !

Its a Saturday ! I ran a 4 KM Marathon today morning. It was refreshing :-). It was the first time I ran one. Got up at 5:30 am, boarded the company bus at 5:45 am and reached the venue at 6:00 am. On that part of the world, it looked like a peak hour of the day! People were full of energy, talking, laughing, warming up and enjoying. At that moment I forgot my sleeplessness and mingled into the crowd. The run started at 7:20 am. I was actually running for sometime but then felt tired and started walking fast and then just walk ! Again short spells of running, jogging and walking. Soon I saw a board saying 1 more km to go !!! I was confused, I was sure that I have not walked 3 KMS till now. After completing the run I was wondering it was really 4 km, I think it was less. The level of tiredness it gave me was less than the gym workout of 3 KMS. As per organisers we ran 4 KMS and that made us happy and pleased but somewhere I knew its less. Let me run on treadmill someday and check how much time i take to run 4 KMS.

Human psychology is easy to manipulate than human senses!

Time !

It just goes on without halt, without pause. Cant stop it, Cant hold it, Cant get rid of it too. Everything we do, say or think is counted by time. One can escape God but not time. Its a crime to waste time, but you can not manage to do something all the time. Its good to sit useless sometimes, doing nothing.. nothing at all.
So here I am, sitting useless after a long time. I love it but it wont last very long :). I am an animal :-D

Expectations

Its a dreaded word for those who have seen the darker side of it. I am one of them. I have many a times missed out on the expectations of my parents and my friends in particular.
I fail to judge sometimes what a person has in mind while saying something. It may be as simple as that I refused a lunch because I was not hungry, is it an offence ? I didn't think so but that person did and felt really bad. But do I deserve to listen to all the bad stuff that person said to me that I don't care, I don't bother, I am selfish etc etc.....
Its good to expect but not so much that it crushes the other person even if other person had no such intention. Expectations should be clubbed with intentions and then a judgement should be arrived at.
If the person had bad intentions and tried to hurt intentionally then it does call for some hot discussion but not otherwise. As friends we should trust each other so much that we can analyse other person's behaviour if he or she is not behaving in an expected manner.

Just getting angry, walking out, shouting does not help. That's not what a relationship is all about.

Nobody can be perfect in relationships. We keep learning through experiences but it really hurts when somebody close to you comes and blames you for something you never intended to. Lets be more reasonable!

We will be past someday !

Old age... something which everybody fears ! Why? because one becomes dependent ? helpless ? weak ? isolated ? aloof ?

Can it be better ? yes sure it can be if we respect older generations and set an example for future generations. Taking care of people at an old age is something that is taken as a burden. I have seen people doing it happily for initial few days but as time passes, they are reluctant to even give the older people a glass of water. Those sons and daughters who got more than 100% from their parents are not able to do even 1% for them. Don't they feel ashamed ??? Parents looked after you day and night, tolerated all your tantrums, stayed awake whole night just to make you sleep and children when they grow up forget all this, make up their own world which has no place for parents !!!! Children mean the world to parents, but for many children parents mean nothing once parents become old.

Its pitiable to see it happening daily in our surroundings, our homes. At least us, who want to take care of our elders should do it whenever possible and when the time comes.

Take care of them, sit and talk to them. Just throwing money wont help, show them that you really really care.

I am not yet doing what I can in this front, but I will try to......

Lost Myself !

My brain cells got damaged ! I have become less efficient and very slow. Was just trying to analyse why all this happened ??
I was pretty fast in my work and very efficient. I felt more confident, focused and motivated. I could maintain a balance between my professional and personal life easily. I kind of had a fair idea about what I am doing and what I want to do. I was one of those enthusiastic persons who are always ready to go !
Due to some unfortunate circumstances I went through a very tough period for around 6 months. That tough phase has ended and I am happy finally. But I think it has done heavy damage to me. I feel very ordinary, the confidence I had has come down.
I am not sure if i will ever be the person I was, I do not know if I will ever feel superb about myself.
All this does not upset me but makes me very thoughtful sometimes. I feel lost at times, and wonder about where this life is taking me.
Just want to know from you experienced people out there if this is normal and I will be fine OR will it never go ? My dreams are still unfulfilled, I want to fulfil them but I lack the enthusiasm I earlier had. Sometimes I am ashamed of myself :-( .
May be I could not explain very well my situation but if I have to say it all in a line I would say that "I have lost myself !" . I want to get back to my own self !

Again :-)

V has tagged me. Tags are a good excuse for introspection !

YOUR MOST HATED…
BEVERAGE: All colas - It plays havoc with the body system.
COLOR:Brown. It reminds me of farmer's suicides. Don't know why.
TOWN/CITY:NA - I have seen multitude of places but I don't hate any place. Everything has a beauty of its own.
ANIMAL:Its a reptile ! Lizard... especially those scaly dark ones :-S
SEASON: Scorching summer of North India - nothing helps that time, wear full clothes or no clothes, it doesn't give you any relief.
ASPECT OF TALKING ON THE PHONE: Can not see the person on other side. What is being said is a joke or not ?
ASPECT OF WATCHING TV OR MOVIES: They go on and on and on....
ASPECT OF EATING IN RESTAURANTS: What to order !!
ASPECT OF SHOWERING: Slow Speed ! ( At least in mine )
ASPECT OF DATING: Artificiality
ASPECT OF THE BEACH: Noisy ! Lonely beaches are peaceful.
ASPECT OF THE GROCERY STORE: Queues. Wait for 30 minutes to buy a 10Rs. chocolate.
HOUSEHOLD CHORE: Washing dishes - Dishwater cant help ! need a better invention
HABIT IN OTHERS?I am the ONLY one capable and others are no good !
HABIT OF YOURS? Sensitivity
THING ABOUT WOMEN? Discussion on guys.
THING ABOUT MEN? Their negative opinion about females!
WHAT’S ANNOYING YOU TODAY? Joblessness

Redefining Success

What is success ? Meeting your set goals ? Getting awards, recognition ? or may be none of them or is it a set of goals you pursue and achieve one after another ?? Can we call half finished race a success ? Can we call an initiative a success ? Does success depends only on results ? Is there any weightage given to sincere efforts that are put to achieve a goal irrespective of end results ?

Mostly NO, success is defined only by end results. There are some scenarios though, wherein I would disagree with this definition of success.

1. There is a child who just had some leg surgery or is disabled. If that kid participates in a race and loses, then its NOT success as per the above definition. But we know that he gathered the strength and guts to even participate and he has put efforts, so he can be called successful.
2. There is a female who is scared of some rowdy who teases her on street every time she goes out. She does not have the courage to look in his eyes, abuse him and slap him. One day she builds up her mind and slaps that rowdy real hard. This might not change the behaviour of that rowdy but can we call this display of courage by the lady a success ?
3. Imagine a budding entrepreneur. He/She starts their own business venture. It runs into losses and due to some unfortunate accident the founder dies. Somebody else takes over and does some changes and the organisation starts making profits. What do we do now ? call the founder a failure even thought he/she initiated that venture ?

So do we change the definition of success ?

No need, lets just change the perspective. Do not call somebody/yourself successful by using somebody else's viewpoint. Define your success as seen from your eyes, call others successful if you would have judged yourself successful in similar circumstances. Use it to brighten up the day of a person who has just lost !

Its a mess !!!

Life is a roller-coaster ride with no controls in my hand. I am experiencing it for the first time. Things are happening at their own mood and pace, and I just simply stand and gape at it helplessly. All this brings a surge of mixed emotions love, hatred, anger. Sometimes I feel am I so stupid and foolish ??? I feel like writing and blabbering non-stop, but there are no ears who would listen to me, and there are no eyes who would read my words.
Things will reach a stable state, but I don't know when, and till they do not reach a conclusion my life is hanging like a pendulum. The sufferer of all this is my sole ambition, I am not giving it enough attention and time is running fast !!! I promise I will catch up as much as I can.

My Fingers are crossed !!
Don't worry if you do not understand a single word written here. If I cant figure out my own thoughts, then how would you :-S

Learned a simple lesson

I was talking to a friend of mine. He told me a principle he follows, it was not an out of the world principle, we all have heard about it billion number of times but its application is really really difficult.
The point is not to get angry. Control your anger as anger upsets you more than the person on whom you become angry. Kudos to him as he told me various incidents wherein a person would have lost his/her temper but he maintained his calm. We also discussed the disastrous impact if he would have lost his cool and discovered that its really not worth to lose your peace of mind over a small issue !

He has asked me to follow it and I will try my best. Let me make a conscious effort to do so !
Thinking on the similar lines, life will be much better if one learns to control all the emotions be it anger, love, hatred, happiness, sadness, excitement etc.

That does not mean that we stop enjoying moments but lets not get overwhelmed by them so that when we lose things we do not crash altogether. Also while cultivating this do not become weak so that people can take you for granted ! Also think of the instances wherein you could have improved the situations if not for your anger !

I am Tagged !!

V Tagged me so here i Go
I am thinking about… When to go home ?.
I said…"I'll wait"
I want to… be more clear about my thoughts.
I wish…to slow down the time machine
I hear… Truly Madly Deeply
I wonder… whats the aim of life ?
I regret… my childish behaviour when the situation demanded a mature one
I am ..calm.
I dance… as soon as music starts playing !
I sing… in the bathroom
I cry… easily
I am not always… sick.
I make with my hands… omlette, sketches.
I write… snippets of news
I confuse… love and friendship
I need… someone
And finally… I tag M, D and U

Gandhigiri

A very popular term nowadays! It has struck a chord somewhere in young India but the wrong one. The chord is that of a style or trend rather than the chord of values. It has become fashionable to use the term Gandhigiri but the real essence behind that is mostly ignored. Even I like the term but understanding the true meaning behind it is a real difficult task.
We all know the terms Non-Violence, Satyagraha and most of us claim to understand it. But let a real situation come and we'll start compromising with the situation rather than fighting with the situation.
Let me give my own example, 2 years back I applied for passport. One of the stage in that process is address verification by police. They just do not do it if you do not bribe them. And I would have faced problems if the process got delayed. I must admit that it did not even take a minute for me to give in to the situation and I paid him the money to get the verification done.

Its really easy to talk and give lecture about all this but in real situations we do not find it so practical as there are other things which assume importance. We know we did wrong but we can not help it. As Gandhiji rightly said , its not easy to do Satyagraha , one has to be really really strong and firm to do it. As an individual I am not that strong yet. I have the tendency to give in to situations even though I know that its wrong.
Still a long way to go....
I dream of getting that strength in me, I am working hard for it. Not due to the trend factor though, but because of my own liking for these simple yet rock strong principles. Let the Gandhian thoughts be translated to action. At least lets give it a try.

A start !

Something about Circular Sphere first …..
Can you call a sphere circular ??? Not really right, circle is a 2D entity and sphere is a 3D entity. Our brain is a circular sphere, wherein inherently it was made to think all the dimensions but as we progress and learn, that extra dimension is cut off. We are forced NOT to think in a different dimension. But still that dimension lives on and drives your life even without you knowing it.

That dimension is the human dimension which differentiates human beings. Human dimension is about righteousness and standing to one’s beliefs. The thoughts in the other two dimesnions scoff at this 3rd dimension as outdated, stale and out of trend. The other 2 dimensions are dominated by society and friends.Society includes your neighbours, office colleagues. With society you share the first dimension wherein you pretend to be in 3rd dimension but when time comes you fall back due to pressure from them. Friends are people with whom you share the 2nd dimension wherein you try to reach 3rd dimension but can not as you are scared of being laughed at.

This 3rd dimension dominates both the other dimensions. The day this 3rd dimension is lost you lose these old values, your path to hell starts where you start enjoying other’s suffering and you make sure people suffer and you gain at their expense. Thats the time when you lose the depth of human emotions and values and the sphere starts looking like a circle.